Varric's Old Friend
by THE-ENEMY-OF-MY-ENEMY-IS-ME
Summary: "You know, I once knew a guy who could take every coin out of your pocket just by smiling at you." (This story is about that specific tale. Because Varric sure knew some good ones)


I know I haven't updated my stories in a while but this has been floating in my head ever since I played Dragon Age 2! When you first see Varric in Hightown he reprimands a thief. At one point he says, "You know, I once knew a guy who could take every coin out of your pocket just by smiling at you." It made me want to come up with this.

It's just a silly one-shot I came up with. It might not be the greatest but I couldn't help myself.

**DISCLAIMER**: I don't own anything that has to do with Varric or Dragon Age 2. I do own Jeric and Zale.

….

"Well, if it isn't the sly, smiling little Fox. You know, when I went home the other day my pouch felt lighter than it was before. You wouldn't know anything about that, would you, boy?" Damn. So close. I spun to look at Jeric Tallen, my mentor, with my signature smile.

"How could you say that, Jeric?" He narrowed his eyes but I waved him off, "I didn't even touch you yesterday. Remember that you wanted to make sure I didn't touch your money again so you established a no touching rule." My mentor had taught me well in the ways of stealing and the thought made me smile brighter.

"I'll as soon believe you, Zale, as when my pouch remains full after you and I see each other." Jeric laughed then ruffled my hair only to grimace, "When's the last time you bathed boy? You're red hair's actually turning black. I'll have no apprentice of mine with dirty hair; thief or not." I snorted. I'm a 15 year old man; I don't need to bathe. That's for girls.

"I'll clean myself when you do old man." That made him growl.

I laughed aloud as Jeric chased me down the streets of Lowtown. A pretty girl giggled off to the side so I skidded to a halt and smirked at her. Instead of checking her out like she thought I was I spotted a good size pouch attached to her waist.

"Hello, beautiful." She giggled louder now. What? Ooh, the girl thought I was talking to her. Jeric was right behind me now so I leaned in and kissed her cheek before darting off down a very small side passage. Jeric couldn't quite fit and I had a newly acquired money purse clutched in my hand.

Opening it up I smirked at the large sum of money that sat inside my prize. Stupid noble girl; didn't you know walking around Lowtown by yourself is a bad thing? I think this calls for some drinks. Too bad Jeric isn't around; I'd offer him one!

The Hanged Man is the worst tavern I've ever been in and I'd been in a lot. It smells, there are people on the floor that could quite possibly be dead, and to top it all off…there was no room service! But I couldn't ask for anything better.

My favorite stool was in the far corner and I surveyed the types of people. Or their coin purses; whichever looked bigger.

"Hey! Another round for me and my associates if you please." I looked across the room to see a dwarf and three other men sitting around a pile of money and a deck of playing cards. Now that was my kind of game! Thinking on my feet was what Jeric said I was known for so I did just that and called over to the barmaid getting ready to bring them their drinks.

"I'll get that." I winked and the woman giggled. EW, okay, I'm 15. Maker, she had to be 40. Shudder. I slid the glasses onto the table then grabbed a spare chair and sat across from the dwarf. In my quick move to sit I nicked one of the men's pockets with my blade.

"And what do you think you're doing here pipsqueak?" The same large man growled at me. Instead of answering him right away I categorized him on my very simple steps system. There are three stages; SMALL (I can take this guy), BIG (uh…maybe I should wait for back-up), or, MANDO BIG (OH SH*T I GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE!) He was definitely in the MANDO category. I had to play my nonexistent cards right or I wouldn't get out of here with any profit.

"Why, I'm just joining in on your diamondback game. I've played since I was a kid and I thought it would be better than waiting around for the guards to get whoever they're looking for outside." My face stayed pointed towards my glass and I glanced out of my eye to see all three men's' expressions flicker with uncertainty.

"…Well, Varric, we'll…uh, get back to you." The other two started gathering their gear while the big man stuffed the coins on the table into his pocket.

"You have a good night!" I smiled and wiggled my fingers at the guys as they scurried toward the back exit. While the show was going on I forgot about the dwarf.

"You do know I'll need my money back?" I raised an eyebrow at him.

"From where? They took it all." His eyes glanced down to where my hand was obscured by the table.

So…for being the first story to be put up in months how is it? I got bored and wanted to try something strange. Hopefully I can finish updating everything soon. Sorry, guys.

THE-ENEMYHeH


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